Notes, Jokes & Quotes for Wednesday/Thursday

Notes of the Day:

  • Pope Gregory I declared rabbit foetuses were marine animals and could be eaten during Lent.
  • Canada has a strategic maple syrup reserve to ensure global supply in case of emergency.
  • Apple’s Siri will flip a coin for you if you can’t make a decision.
  • People with high IQs tend to appreciate dark humor more.
  • U.S. Senator Joe McCarthy was a heroin addict in his later years, and the U.S. government paid for his heroin.
  • During WWI, a group of Russian and German soldiers agreed to a cease-fire to fend off an attack by wolves.
  • The earliest known @ sign features in a 14th century Bulgarian translation of a Greek chronicle. It is used instead of an a, but historians aren’t sure why.

Jokes of the Day:

  •  An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled, “Stop! Acts 2:38!” (Repent and be baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ so that your sins may be forgiven.) The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done. As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, “Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to you.” “Scripture?” replied the burglar. “She said she had an ax and two 38’s!”
  • The phone rings in the middle of the night at a doctor’s house.  He answers and it is his friend, another doctor, that tells him:  “we need a fourth player for our card game”.  So he gets up and puts on his coat.  As he is leaving, his wife asks : “Is it something serious?”, and he replies:  “You can bet on it.  There are three doctors in there already and they need my help”.
  • Did you hear about the two guys who stole a calendar?  They each got 6 months.
  • What did one eye say to the other?  Between you and me, something smells.
  • What does a wicked chicken lay?  Deviled eggs.


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Quotes of the Day:

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