Notes, Jokes & Quotes of the Day for Monday/Tuesday

Notes of the Day:

  •  October 8, 1956 Don Larsen pitched the only perfect game in a World Series as the New York Yankees beat the Brooklyn Dodgers 2-1 in game 5.
  • Axolotls can regenerate limbs, organs and even parts of the brain. They are 1000 times more resistant to cancer than mammals.
  • Madrid has the oldest running restaurant in the world, Sobrino de Botín, open since 1725.
  • Ben Affleck is banned for life from playing Blackjack at the Hard Rock Casino in Las Vegas after being caught counting cards.
  • Onychophagia is the technical term for biting your nails.
  • In 2011, scientists re-measured Norway’s beaches, islands and fjords, adding 11,000 miles to its coastline.
  • Before Queen Elizabeth II puts her shoes on, a member of the royal household wears them first, to make sure they are comfortable.

Jokes of the Day:

  •  For a period, Houdini used a trap door in every single show he did…I guess you could say it was a stage he was going through.
  • Q: Why do Jewish mothers make great parole officers?
    A: They never let anyone finish a sentence!
  • An Amish husband, wife and son travel to the city on vacation. They visit a shopping mall and while the mother is shopping, the father and son are standing in awe in front of an elevator (having no idea what it is). As they watch, an elderly lady walks into the strange silver doors and the doors close. The father and son watch as the numbers go up, and then back down. When the doors open, a beautiful young woman walks out. The father leans over and whispers to the son, “Son, go get your mother!”
  • A cowboy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks for a shot. Across the bar, a Mexican man is sitting and glaring at the cowboy. The cowboy takes the shot and slams the shot glass down on the counter, yelling, “TGIF!” The Mexican orders a shot, takes it, and slams his glass down, yelling, “SPIT!” The cowboy looks over at him and notices the Mexican guy is still staring at him. The cowboy once again orders a shot, slams it down, and yells again “TGIF!” Once again, the Mexican orders a shot, slams it down after consuming it, and yells out, “SPIT!” This goes on for a while, and the bartender stands puzzled and annoyed. Finally, the bartender asks the cowboy, “Just checking, but do you know what TGIF means?” and the cowboy replies, “Hell ya I know what it means, ‘Thank God It’s Friday!'” The bartender asks the Mexican guy, “Okay, so what does ‘SPIT’ mean?” and the Mexican replies, “Stupid Pendejo It’s Thursday!”

Quotes of the Day:

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