Notes, Jokes & Quotes of the Day for the Weekend (Updated)

Notes of the Day:

  •  Most kamikaze pilots in WWII died in vain.  Only 1 in 9 pilots hit their targets.
  • Studies show that tattoos make it more difficult to find skin cancer, since a malignant mole can take on the color of the tattoo surrounding it.
  • The human eye can distinguish about 10 million different colors.
  • Abe Lincoln is enshrined in the Wrestling Hall of Fame, having lost just once in 300 matches.
  • The first American train robbery happened this weekend in the year 1866.

Jokes of the Day:

  •  Why do seagulls fly over the sea, because if  they flew over the bay, they would be “bagels”.
  • Fred: “Why do elephants wear red nail polish?”
    Bob: “I don’t know, why?”
    Fred: “To hide in cherry trees.”
    Bob: “But I’ve never seen an elephant in a cherry tree.”
    Fred: “See, it works.”
  • Timmy-Can I go the toilet?
    Teacher-said say the alphabet
    Teacher-where’s the P
    Timmy-half way down my leg.
  • Q: Why are atoms Catholic?
    A: Because they have mass.
  • A country preacher decided to skip services one Sunday to spend the day hiking in the wilderness. Rounding a sharp bend in the trail, he collided with a bear and was sent tumbling down a steep grade. He landed on a rock and broke both legs.With the ferocious bear charging at him from a distance, the preacher prayed, “O Lord, I’m so sorry for skipping services today. Please forgive me and grant me just one wish–make a Christian out of that bear that’s coming at me!”At that very instant, the bear skidded to a halt, fell to his knees, clasped his paws together, and began to pray aloud at the preacher’s feet: “Dear God, please bless this food I am about to receive.”

Quotes of the Day:

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