Notes, Jokes, & Quotes for Friday/Saturday

Notes of the Day:

  •  Francis Scott Key wrote the lyrics to “The Star-Spangled Banner” after witnessing the British bombardment of Fort McHenry during the war of 1812.  September 14, 1814.
  • 80% of information stored on all computers in the world is in English.
  • Kissing someone is more sanitary than shaking hands, if you want to avoid a cold.
  • People who regularly eat dinner or breakfast in restaurants double their risk of becoming obese.
  • Iran arrested 14 squirrels for spying in 2007.

 

Jokes of the Day:

  •  A man walks out on his front porch one day and sees a gorilla in the tree on his front lawn. He calls animal control and about an hour later a man shows up with a ladder, a pit bull, and a shotgun. The animal control employee tells the man, “I’m here to get the gorilla out of your tree. I’m going to use this ladder to climb up the tree and shake the branch the gorilla is on to knock him to the ground. The pit bull is trained to go after anything that falls from the tree and bites them which calms the animal down so I can put him in the truck.” The man says “Okay, I see what the ladder and the pit bull are for but what is the shotgun for?” The animal control employee says, “Oh, that’s for you. In case I fall out of the tree instead of the gorilla.”
  • A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, “And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?”.  Annie replied, “because people are sleeping”.
  • The secret to a long marriage is that we take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes on Tuesdays. I go on Fridays.

 

Quotes of the Day:

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